100+ Funny Response to “Don’t Let Bedbugs Bite”

“Ever been told ‘Don’t let the bedbugs bite’ just as you’re about to hit the hay, and wondered how to come back with a witty reply?

It’s a bedtime classic, often said in jest to wish you a peaceful night.

In this article, I’ll share some hilarious comebacks for the next time you hear, ‘Don’t let the bedbugs bite!’

Let’s dive in!”

100+ Funny Response to “Don’t Let Bedbugs Bite”

• “I’ve trained them to bite only on command.”
• “And may your nightmares be filled with unicorns!”
• “Too late, we’re planning a midnight feast.”
• “I’ll try, but they’ve developed a taste for me.”
• “They’re my pets, they won’t bite me!”
• “I’ve trained them to sing lullabies instead!”
• “Will do, but the mosquitoes are another story.”
• “I’ve taught them to tango instead!”
• “They’ve promised to nibble gently.”
• “I’ve scheduled their dinner time, unfortunately it’s not bedtime.”
• “They only bite on Tuesdays.”
• “They’ve gone vegan, so I’m safe.”
• “Good thing, I’m not their type.”
• “Okay, but I can’t promise the same for the dust mites.”
• “I’ve been assured they only nibble.”
• “They’re on a strict diet—no humans after midnight.”
• “Biting is so last season, they’re into tickling now.”
• “But they promised me a good night kiss!”
• “They’re off duty after 10 PM.”
• “They’ve signed a peace treaty with me.”
• “They have braces now, biting is a challenge.”
• “I’ve given them a bedtime story, they’ll be asleep.”
• “They’re fasting today.”
• “Don’t worry, they’ve got dentures!”
• “They’re too busy watching late-night TV.”
• “I’ve switched them to a fruit diet.”
• “They only bite on full moon nights.”
• “They’re on strike for better working conditions.”
• “I’ve got them hooked on Netflix, they won’t bother.”
• “I’ve put them in their own tiny beds.”
• “They’re too busy tweeting.”
• “They’re on vacation this week.”
• “They promised not to bite if I let them watch cartoons.”
• “They’ve joined a non-violence movement.”
• “They’re attending yoga classes, too relaxed to bite.”
• “They’re too busy playing video games.”
• “I’ve enrolled them in a no-bite therapy.”
• “They’ve been instructed to give massages instead.”
• “I’ve got them on a strict no-human diet.”
• “They’re on a juice cleanse.”
• “I’ve got them on a leash, they won’t bother.”
• “They’re practicing social distancing.”
• “They’re in a meeting with the fleas.”
• “They’re too busy practicing their dance moves.”
• “I’ve got them hooked to Sudoku, they won’t bite.”
• “They’re working on their night cheese.”
• “They’re busy with their knitting.”
• “They’re on a sugar-free diet.”
• “They’re attending a motivational speech on ‘Not biting’.”
• “They’re busy updating their status on Facebook.”
• “They’ve migrated to the couch.”
• “I’ve set up a mini gym for them.”
• “They’re busy prepping for a marathon.”
• “They’re too busy planning their next holiday.”
• “They’re attending a TED talk on ‘The Art of Not Biting’.”
• “They’re in a book club meeting.”
• “They’re busy painting their tiny little homes.”
• “They’re too scared of my teddy bear.”
• “They’re busy playing chess.”
• “They’re out partying.”
• “They’re busy planning their Halloween costumes.”
• “They’re busy practicing mindfulness.”
• “They’re singing karaoke.”
• “They’re busy playing Pokemon Go.”
• “They’re busy gossiping with the spiders.”
• “They’re learning a new language on Duolingo.”
• “I’ve set up a movie night for them.”
• “They’re too busy training for a tiny Olympics.”
• “They’ve joined a bite anonymous group.”
• “They’re busy playing hide and seek.”
• “They’re busy taking an online course on ‘How to stop biting’.”
• “They’re too busy with their pet flea.”
• “They’re too busy doing push-ups.”
• “They’re manifesting their dreams.”
• “I’ve introduced them to yoga, they’re pretty zen now.”
• “They’re on a no-bite diet.”
• “I’ve sent them to a sleepover at the neighbor’s.”
• “They’re in a meeting with the pillow.”
• “They’re too busy playing charades.”
• “They’re busy taking a Zumba class.”
• “They’re busy making TikTok videos.”
• “They’re too busy watching reality TV.”
• “They’re practicing their acting skills for a bedbug play.”
• “They’re on a Netflix binge.”
• “They’re in a meditation retreat.”
• “They’re too busy with their new hobby, knitting.”
• “They’re busy playing mini-golf.”
• “They’re attending a seminar on stress management.”
• “They’re too busy planning their next vacation to a bite-free destination.”
• “I’ve introduced them to the world of puzzles and they can’t get enough!”
• “They’re busy creating art with their non-biting hand.”
• “They’re too busy reading a book on how to break bad habits.”
• “They’ve joined a support group for chronic biters.”
• “They’re learning how to give themselves a manicure instead of biting their nails.”
• “They’re busy baking and decorating cookies instead of biting their fingers.”
• “I’ve taught them how to do a self-massage for stress relief.”
• “They’re too busy with their new passion for gardening.”
• “They’re watching cute animal videos to distract themselves from biting.”
• “They’ve started using fidget toys to keep their hands occupied.”
• “I’ve introduced them to the joy of bubble wrap popping as a healthier alternative.”

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1. “I’ve trained them to bite only on command.”

This phrase playfully implies that you have command over the bedbugs, as though you’ve trained them like pets and can dictate when they should or shouldn’t bite. It’s a humorous way of reassuring someone with a goodnight wish, suggesting, “Don’t worry, the bed bugs won’t bite unless I give them the signal.”

2. “And may your nightmares be filled with unicorns!”

This lighthearted response implies that if you’re bound to have nightmares (usually filled with frightening imagery), they might as well be filled with something as whimsical and harmless as unicorns.

It’s a humorous way to wish someone a restful night, infused with creativity and playfulness.

ALSO VISIT: Response to “Sweet Dreams”

3. “Too late, we’re planning a midnight feast.”

The speaker jests about organizing a late-night feast with the bedbugs, treating these tiny pests as if they were guests at a culinary event.

This not only humorously dismisses the old bedtime warning but also creates a playful image that is likely to bring about laughter.

4. “I’ll try, but they’ve developed a taste for me.”

The phrase essentially implies that you’ll try to steer clear of any minor annoyances or problems (“bedbugs” in this context).

However, humorously, it suggests these “bedbugs” have taken a liking to bothering or “biting” you, indicating these issues persistently return or are hard to avoid.

ALSO READ: Ways to Reply “Hope to See You”

5. “They’re my pets, they won’t bite me!”

It’s akin to suggesting that bedbugs are akin to pets, and just as pets typically wouldn’t harm their owners, these “pet” bedbugs wouldn’t bite you either.

This humorous response playfully dismisses the old saying and may even help alleviate any bedtime fears.

6. “I’ve trained them to sing lullabies instead!”

This humorous response suggests that instead of biting, you’ve trained the bedbugs to serenade you with soothing songs, much like lullabies, to aid your sleep.

The concept of bedbugs singing instead of biting is quite amusing. It’s a joke you can share with friends during a sleepover or campfire to lighten the mood.

Making light of bedbugs singing lullabies is a playful way to demonstrate that you’re not fretting over minor issues and can find humor in them.

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7. “Will do, but the mosquitoes are another story.”

This response is humorous because it takes the original saying about bedbugs—tiny pests that might bite you in bed—and twists it by mentioning mosquitoes, another bothersome insect known for its annoyance, especially at night.

It’s as if you’re quipping, “I can handle bedbugs, but mosquitoes are a whole other story!”

This joke could be perfect to share during summer or at a camp where mosquitoes are prevalent.

It’s a playful acknowledgment that while you might manage to avoid one problem, there’s always another funny or annoying challenge (like mosquitoes) waiting for you.

8. “I’ve taught them to tango instead!”

This humorous response suggests that instead of fretting over bedbugs biting, you’ve taken the initiative to teach them the tango.

It’s as if you’re implying you’ve befriended the bedbugs and are enjoying a playful time with them.

This joke is perfect for eliciting laughter by turning the notion of pesky bedbugs into something whimsical and surprising.

You can share this joke with friends to bring about some giggles, especially when discussing bedtime or bugs.

9. They’ve promised to nibble gently.

This response suggests that you’ve struck a deal with the bedbugs—they’re allowed to bite, but only a little bit.

It’s as if you’re playfully pretending to have a friendly understanding with these tiny insects. This joke might provoke laughter because it’s amusing to imagine negotiating with bedbugs.

You can share this joke with friends to get a good chuckle, especially when discussing sleep or bugs. It’s a playful way to show you’re not overly concerned about minor issues.

10. I’ve scheduled their dinner time, unfortunately it’s not bedtime.

This response suggests that you’ve scheduled a specific feeding time for the bedbugs, but unfortunately, it’s not when you’re going to bed.

It’s akin to jokingly treating the bedbugs as pets and setting a dinner schedule for them, much like you would for a pet dog or cat.

However, the twist is that their mealtime isn’t aligned with bedtime, so they might still bite you while you’re asleep.

This type of humor is effective for generating laughter because it’s unexpected and a bit whimsical.

You can use this joke to lighten the atmosphere and provoke some chuckles in a casual setting like a sleepover or campfire.

11. They’re in a meeting with the pillow.

Rather than fretting about bedbugs, you envision them as miniature creatures engaged in a serious meeting with your pillow.

It’s as if you’re transforming these bugs into characters in a whimsical tale, holding a significant discussion with another part of your bed.

This joke is sure to elicit laughter because it offers a creative and playful perspective on something typically regarded as bothersome.

Share this humorous anecdote with friends during sleepovers or in relaxed conversations to inject a bit of fun and imaginative flair.

12. They’re too busy playing charades.

This witty reply suggests that you’re jokingly imagining the bedbugs are too engrossed in a game to bother biting you.

It’s akin to suggesting that the bugs are so preoccupied with their own amusement that they’ve forgotten about causing any trouble for you.

This joke is perfect for eliciting laughter among friends, especially during a sleepover or late-night gathering.

13. They’re busy taking a Zumba class.

This response humorously suggests that the bedbugs are too busy participating in a lively Zumba class to bother with biting you.

The image of bedbugs engaging in Zumba, a spirited dance fitness activity, is quite amusing. It’s a joke you can share with friends or during a sleepover to bring smiles all around.

By turning the notion of bedbugs into something whimsical and light-hearted, this joke playfully demonstrates how you can find humor in everyday expressions.

14. They’re busy making TikTok videos.

“Tell them you’re too busy making TikTok videos to worry about bedbugs” is a playful response to the classic saying “don’t let the bedbugs bite.”

It suggests that you’re so immersed in something trendy and modern that old concerns like bedbugs don’t even register.

This joke can resonate well among friends, especially those familiar with the popularity and allure of making TikTok videos.

15. They’re too busy watching reality TV.

It’s akin to saying you’re so captivated by the fun and drama on TV that nothing else, not even bedbugs, can distract you.

This response playfully highlights your preference for the engaging world of reality TV over old sayings about bugs.

It’s a joke that’s sure to bring laughter among friends, especially those who know your passion for watching these shows.

Feel free to share this humorous quip at a sleepover or casual gathering to lighten the mood and spark conversation.